Wednesday, March 29, 2006


Or, if you have to probably aren't doing it!

By Theolonius McTavish, a committed creative catnapper, a irreverent icon of idling, and a very smooth schmoozer, (especially with a margarita in one hand, my bronze body in a deck-chair, and my toes in the water)

I stumbled across an on-line article today on "workaholism", (as I was merrily making my way toward the kitchen in my trapdoor pj's at 11:00 am, just in the nick of time for my fourth cup of caffeine).

While "workaholism" has been described as "the addiction that society applauds", engaging in any form of loitering, lollygagging, or leisure is generally frowned upon by pundits, professionals and politicians.

Nearly 237,000 web pages are devoted to the ravages of "workaholism", while it's solution, "creative loafing" (with almost 1,370,000 internet web pages devoted to the topic), is rarely mentioned as an effective remedy by accredited heath care professionals, spiritual counsellors, or educators.

And, while some who suffer from "the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" that often accompany their need to serve others or to do more than is humanly possible to receive their 'brownie points', others enrol in 12-step recovery programs to rid them of their evil ways. On the other hand, "creative loafers" have learned to accept life just the way it is and to enjoy it to the fullest.

Creative loafing implies a willingness to let go of all the "shoulds" in one's life, toss the "to do" list in the nearest refuse receptacle, and to focus on "being" as opposed to "doing".

Creative loafing means being comfortable with yourself and with life itself...without the need to justify anything or to change anyone). It means not being afraid to experience the rich tapestry of one's inner as well as outer landscape.

There is definitely something to be said for "going with the flow". Just as the nursery rhyme suggests perhaps one might forget about "waiting for Godot" and simply "row row row your boat, gently down the stream, merrily merrily merrily merrily, because "life" truly "is but a dream."

So, quit complaining about how hard it is to paddle upstream, or even why you're up a creek without a paddle in the first place! "Wake up and smell the roses", listen to the birds chirping, and then when the stars come out at night, use them to guide you to your true passion or purpose in life.

First, if you're having a hard time figuring out what to do, why not ask your favorite figure in history, a cartoon character, or perhaps a matinee idol, "how would you tackle this situation"? If that doesn't work -- write your predicament down on a piece of paper, roll it up and tie a bow around it, and drop it in a "pitty pot". Now you can do some "dilemma dumpster diving" or maybe trade your problem for someone else's!

Second, climb into your own skin for a change, and listen to your "inner imp" who's eager to come out and play. (This little leprechaun really couldn't give a hoot about what the neighbors will think, or for that matter what your boss and/or colleagues at work might say or do)!

And last of all, smile and let your hair down. Why not cherish your own light, gifts and talents and become the hero of your very own story! When you do that, you'll recognize the light, gifts, and talents of others and be willing to share them along life's highways and byways...because that's what "creative loafing" is all about.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006


Or, where's all the fooforaw?

By Theolonius McTavish, a quirky Celt who's trying to find the lippy little leprechaun who waltzed off with his collection of four-leaf clovers, a shoebox full of rabbit feet, and his stash of magic mushrooms.

Victoria, (the capital of British Columbia), is home to many things including a wax museum, a bug zoo, and a lovely Disneyland-like light show held every night (at taxpayers' expense) on the grounds of the legislature.

It is also home to a grab-bag of gaffers and giggle-minded folk who simply adore defying gravity with their own version of levity and light-hearted entertainment.

The Creative Loafing Institute recognizes the important creative contribution made by other lollygaggers and leisure-inspired individuals who make this city one of Canada's most commodious if not quaint "cultural capitals".

So, for those with oodles of time on their hands, a sense of curiosity, and some funny money in their pockets, do drop by and take in a bit of jolly good cheer provided by Victoria's sometimes irreverently-inspired artists, musicians, and thespians.

Atomic Vaudeville - Apparently this "theatrical throw-down", knee-slapping troupe of titillating titbits can charm the pants off practically everyone they meet...(which is probably why they have a puckish prevention program called 'Adopt An Actor'). Their shows have included such hee-haw hits like: Fora's Funhouse, Redneck Revival, and The Gayest Show on Earth.

Four Seasons Musical Theatre - This gem is devoted to nourishing the inner imp in everyone, no matter what age or station in life. Family fun and frolic often includes some jolly sing-alongs which keep the actors, writers and composers hopping in this company.

Impromaniacs - This gaggle of gigglers has been keeping crowds in stitches since 1989 performing at Fringe events not to mention establishing their own improv show, "The Victoria International Improv Festival" (to be held in Victoria this year from September 28 - 30, 2006 at Intrepid Theatre's Metro Studio.)

Intrepid Theatre - Producer of Canada's oldest one-person theatre full of high-voltage whackadoo acts the Uno Festival of Solo Performance (May 24-June 4, 2006), the ever popular puckish performances provided by many talented titillators at the Victoria Fringe Theatre Festival (August 24-September 4), and last but not least, the Intrepid Petri Dish New Play Contest.

Langham Court Theatre + The Victoria Theatre Guild & Dramatic School - The roots of this group lie in miming and masquerade, a popular performance genre in the late 1920's. Now one of the city's best known performance theatres, it plays host to a variety of vintage vignettes and delightful ditties -- nearly 3,000 performance of more than 500 shows to over 250,000 patrons.

Play With Your Food - This eatery-come-entertainment establishment is located in a downtown "déclassé" droll booth, (owned by by a couple of part-time hams -- Dean Christy and Bill Johnston). It offers an eclectic selection of original witty work and occasionally the group borrows from some very bodacious if not belly-laughing burlesque shows! Dean is also quick to add that while this city may be a cultural capital of Canada but, "the only active culture in Victoria is found in the yogurt at Thrifty's" (according to an interview appearing in the Times Colonist, Saturday, March 25, 2006).

Spilt Milk Comedy - Besides offering much needed comic relief in what has been termed a "hot air" and "trial balloon" city, (in which the well-padded seat of government is situated), they also provide a wide variety of custom-designed comedy workshops and corporate events.

Thirty Cent Players - Founded in January 2005, these potty personalities perform live every Thursday night in front of tankards and tipplers at Belle's Bar on Yates Street, where they host you guessed it... "Thirsty Beaver Comedy Night" (produced by Three Schooner Productions).

Theatre Inconnu - As Victoria's longest producing alternative theatre company, it is known for its innovative approach to the classics as seen in the "Faust Fest" and "One Man Hamlet" shows, and its high-profile annual summer Shakespeare Festival production.

Throw Us A Line Improv - This fiddlesticks and fooforaw group has performed in weekly comedy nights at the James Bay Inn, but now has taken up ripsnorting residence at Sopranos Karoake & Sports Bar in the Traveller's Inn, 1961 Douglas Street. So trot down one Wednesday evening to see them tossing their tacky lines back and forth or just taking tit-for-tat from a fesity floorshow audience.


Apparently there's also something called The StandUp Comedy Feast that's been going on for more than two decades, but if you didn't catch their last foolish food for thought at Murph's Pub on Douglas might want to try their fun-with-food booking agent.

The above list represents but a smattering or at best a smidgen of what this city has to offer residents and visitors alike. Pick up a copy of Victoria's weekly mmm...good guide to entertainment in the city, Monday Magazine or Victoria News for more event details.

Monday, March 27, 2006


Or, if fools rush in where angels fear to tread, then where do they usually hang their hat when they're not falling in love or parting with their money?

By Theolonius McTavish, a jest-in-time news junkie, who spends far too much time seeking pots of gold at the end of rainbows, kissing blinking blarney stones without too much luck, and commiserating over the lack of four-leaf clovers in his field of dreams!

Well, April Fools' Day is drawing near. While "every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day and wisdom consists of not exceeding that limit", April 1st is one day when we can truthfully say that the sky is the limit for playing the fool!

So, what better occasion than now to find out just where all those Canadian class-clowns and comics call home.

A quick glance at a Mirth Map of Canada suggests there may be a whole lot of tomfoolery going on in the following places:
  • Chin or Community Punch Bowl (Alberta)
  • Loos or Ta Ta Creek (British Columbia)
  • Button or Finger (Manitoba)
  • Dipper Harbour or Five Fingers (New Brunswick)
  • Cow's Lick or Leading Tickles West (Newfoundland & Labrador)
  • Thumb's Island (Northwest Territories)
  • Dingwall or Ecum Secum (Nova Scotia)
  • Belcher Islands or Zebra Mountain (Nunavut)
  • Funnybone Lake or Punkeydoodles Corners (Ontario)
  • Oyster Bed Bridge or Uigg (Prince Edward Island)
  • Baie des Ha! Ha! or Funny Lake (Quebec)
  • Limerick or Smuts (Saskatchewan)
  • Snafu Creek and Snag (Yukon Territories)

On second thought, maybe it's a good idea to stay far away from a "fool's paradise". And if you're not sure where that it is, just follow Will Roger's advice - it's the spot where "everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects."


And don't forget to join the rest of the foolish food for thought folks in Victoria, BC on April Fools' Day at Ogden Point Cafe (near the Breakwater)!

Saturday, March 25, 2006


By Fannie Fortunata, Cut-and-Paste Coordinator at the Creative Loafing Institute, a fully accredited fool-proof establishment offering programs for those wishing to find their funnybones or those keen on cracking their wishbones while waiting for Godot to arrive (and tell them why they’re waiting, who's coming, what to do, where to go, when to show up, and how to decide if they’ve arrived wherever they’re supposed to be going in the great scheme of all things big and small ...or perhaps anywhere in between if that’s okay with everyone)

Fools everywhere will be pleased to hear that the annual “Feast of Fools” festivity is alive and well in Victoria, British Columbia.

In keeping with the best traditions of high jinks, jestering or jokering not to mention blithe bowls of cherries and jolly good fun, the Creative Loafing Institute is inviting everyone to a grass-roots gleeful gathering on Saturday, April 1st 2006.

“Dick Danger”, Manager of Malapropisms and Mirthful Meals, at the Ogden Point Café (where the glad-handing gambol will take place), is keen to let everyone know what’s in store in the way of delightful dishes and droll desserts.

Giggling guests will have a wide assortment of amusing items to choose from on April Fools’ Day. The menu of mirth and merriment will feature a few frivolous things for frolicsome folks who have difficulty mincing their words, but do enjoy munching on merry mouthfuls as long as no one is correcting them on their tacky table manners.

Boisterous Beverages:

Bird Brain Beer, Clodplate Coolers, Cackling Cappuccino, Egad Espresso, Fizzy Whizzes, Ho Ho Ho Hot Chocolate, Jolly Juices, Loopy Latte, Schlepping Ciders, Titillating Teas, Wiseacre Wine, (and last but not least), Whoopee Water

Amusing Appetizers:

Chortling Chicken Wings, Nincompoop Nachos & Nibbles, Chortling Chicken Wings, Prankster Potato Skins, and Sassy Spring Rolls

Merry Main Courses:

Laughingstock Lasagna, Nitwit Noodles, Quipping Quiches, Saucy Side-Salads, Snickering Sandwich & Soup Combos, Posh Piggies-in-A-Blanket, Witty Whatnots

Diversionary Desserts:

Babbling Bars, Buffo Bread Pudding, Chuckling Cheesecakes, Crackpot Cookies, Comical Crisps, Peek-a-boo Pies, Raucous Rice Pudding, Simple Simon Squares, Irreverent Ice Cream, Tittering Tarts

Those who adore “playing with their food” (as opposed to actually eating it), or those who are allergic to “food for thought”, should be prepared to entertain themselves by twiddling their thumbs or wiggling their ears quietly. Failing that, they should be prepared to come up with something really nifty to keep things to a dull roar for the rest of the patrons (who probably have incredibly short-attention spans).

By the way, during the daytime, “Dick Danger” is a magnificent mild-mannered manager of meals. At night however, (especially on April 1st and Halloween), he has been known to change his name and his attire in order to keep the company of some very colourful characters including “The Great Pumpkin”, “The Tooth Fairy” and “The Jolly Green Giant”!

For those who haven't got a clue how to find their way to Ogden Point Cafe - here's a map!

Friday, March 24, 2006


Or, where to find the best bit of boffo and buns on April 1st in Victoria, B.C.

The Creative Loafing Institute is pleased to announce that a great giggle gathering will be held on the occasion of April Fools' Day, (in what is generally known as the "granola and grinning capital" of Canada -- Victoria, British Columbia).

Those wishing to partake of the piffling piece of puckery may drop by for a bit of buffoonery, (provided of course they come suitably attired in some foolish or funky fashion statement, wear a saucy smile, and consume a smattering of snickers or pig out on a "meal of mirth").

This is a do-it-yourself evening of drollery, so those who attend should bring along anything designed to make lollygaggers and leisure-challenged folks laugh out loud, roll on the floor, or titter tastelessly (at least for a few hours on this often forgotten day of frippery).

All manner of creative and quirky contributions to the "Grin Bin" will be accepted including a mirthful memo you'd love to send to your buttonhead boss or cat-napping colleague, or demonstrating how to build sandcastles in the air without any budget, supplies or time.

If that's too difficult just bring along a sample of your titillating talents -- be it dancing with your two left feet, doing zany zodiac readings, doodling/droodling, (finger) painting, playing the glockenspiel or a fast game of 'Rock Paper Scissors', singing sucky-face songs, sculpting with playdough, snapping funny photos, telling tacky tales, or amazing everyone with magic stuff like touching your toes, twiddling your thumbs and wiggling your ears all at the same time etc.

Admission is free, but giggling guests are strongly advised to empty their piggy banks so they can purchase things that will fill their tummies, perhaps boggle their minds, and more than likely leave them wondering what wizardesses do for a night off.

DATE: Saturday, April 1, 2006

TIME: 5:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m.

PLACE: Ogden Point Cafe, 199 Dallas Road, (at the Breakwater) in Victoria, British Columbia.


Note: word has it that a very vintage vixen or voluble vegetarian vamp may make a special guest appearance -- stay tune for more at the home of the Quipping Queen.

Monday, March 20, 2006


The Creative Loafing Institute Presents a Posh New Program

The Creative Loafing Institute, dedicated to the the art of astonishment and spirit of serendipity, not to mention blissful begetting, egregious euphoria, and just plain old fun and frolic, is proud to announce that spring has finally sprung in Victoria, British Columbia (Canada).

Besides being "blooming" capital city of Canada's most western province, Victoria is also home to a band of boisterous brouhaha types who love to laugh out loud, twiddle their thumbs with ecstacy, and share their philosophy of life with anyone who cares to listen including offleash dogs, hungry seagulls, and bodacious baristas!

While some profess a lifetime commitment to waiting for Godot, the merry-making members of the Creative Loafing Institute, have dedicated themselves wholeheartedly to the lost art of lounging and lollygagging about or just passionately puttering in a pleasantly playful manner.

For those who enjoy delightful dillydallying, frittering time away, or goofing off over a slow sip of coffee or tea and hot bun or two in the companionship of like-minded slackers and sloths with a good sense of humor, why not drop by our weekly wit and wonder get-togethers.

Date: Every Tuesday
Time: 10:00 am - 11:30 am
Place: Ogden Point Cafe (199 Dallas Road near "The Breakwater")
Admission: At least three smiles and your choice of a bodacious beverage and/or biscuit/bun.


For directions to this sassy and sunny spot, look no further!